How to Make Friends in Your 20s and 30s

How to Make Friends in Your 20s and 30s
If you are not sure how to make friends, then you are not alone. It is especially tricky to find new friends in your 20s or 30s. When you leave school, and there is no longer a large group of other people in your vicinity that is the same age and stage in life as you are, it can be more difficult to meet new friends. Starting a friendship with people takes both patience and persistence. Although for some people, finding new friends can be a breeze, it isn’t the same thing for everyone. Some find it awkward to strike a conversation with strangers, which makes it extra hard to make new friends. If you are feeling a little bit rusty on how to make new friends and expand your social circle, here are some tips and tricks and everything you need to master how to make friends in your 20s or 30s.

3 Types of Friends: What Type of Friends Are You Looking For?

Fool Proof Way on How to Make Friends in Your 20s and 30s 2 There are different kinds of friends, and if you are looking to make and foster some more friendships, it will help if you know clearly what kind of friends you are looking for.


Acquaintances are people you often see at places you frequent or someone you know a little bit, like a classmate or a coworker or some neighbors. This type of friend is one you usually say hi when you see each other at the office, or the street then say bye at the end of the day, but nothing more. This type of friendship never lasts, especially when the environment is changed or removed, like when you leave the workplace or graduate from school.

Regular Friends

Regular friends, like its name implies, are the kind of friends you meet regularly. They can be your social or activity buddies like those friends you go with to the gym because you both like working out. You usually hang out with your regular friends or catch up with them, and you usually can talk about regular topics anytime and anywhere.

Best (Soul) Friends

Best friends or soul friends, on the other hand, are people you don’t necessarily meet or hang out with every day, but friendship is always there. They are the kind of friends that you can talk to about anything and everything, the ones who you seek to talk about problems and secrets you can’t or don’t want to talk about with your regular friends. With this kind of friendship, your relationship with each other doesn’t depend on how often you meet up or talk, they are always there whenever you need them, and you are the same way towards them. So, with your quest to know how to make friends, what kind of friends are you looking to have?

What to Look for in a Friend?

Fool Proof Way on How to Make Friends in Your 20s and 30s 3While it takes a bit of time and effort to meet and make new friends, having healthy friendships is a treasure. Spending time with people that you like spending time with can help elevate your mood. They also would make an excellent companion if you have activities or things you both enjoy doing, plus, friends can be real motivators, and they can help you reach your goals. Talking to friends, especially when you have problems, can help lighten up your mood and your feelings, helping reduce depression and stress. But, not every people you meet with becoming a friend or a close one. If you want to have the kind of friendships that could last and stand the test of time, then you must know what to look for in friends as well. The key on how to make friends is to focus on looking at the way the friendship feels and not what you think friendship looks like. In short, focus on making quality friends and not about collecting as many friends, which only looks better on paper. If you want to have some ideas on what a good friendship feels like, you can ask yourself some of these questions?
  • Am I myself when I’m around this person?
  • Is this a friend I can trust?
  • Am I treated with respect or this person supportive?
  • Do I feel better after talking or being with this person?
  • Do I feel like I can say whatever I want, or do I feel like I have to watch what I say when I talk to this person?
The bottom line, when it comes to friendship, is that, if the relationship feels good, then that friendship is good. However, if a “friend” tries to criticize you, control you, or abuses the good things that you do for them, then that isn’t the kind of friendship you want.

Where to Meet New Friends in Your 20s and 30s?

Fool Proof Way on How to Make Friends in Your 20s and 30s 4It is easy to strike a friendship with people who you see more often like people in your neighborhood or in your workplace. The more you see a particular person, the more likely you are to make friends with them. Plus, it’s easier to strike a conversation and less awkward to talk to people you often see or meet. So, if you are looking for the best places where you can practice on how to make new friends, then check out these places.


One of the best places to make new friends in your 20s or 30s is with the people in your neighborhood. These are people you usually see on a day-to-day basis. So, if you happen to see one of your neighbors as you walk the street with your dog in tow, you can easily say hi or good morning and catch up with their day. Plus, it’s easy to start a friendship with people who you most probably already know a bit about. Like, if you know they have kids that go to the same school as your kids, school things can be a nice conversation starter.


The office is also one of the easiest places where you can make new friends. It doesn’t have to be the same people you have on your team or your department. You can venture out in other teams or other departments. If you work in the same office or company, you share a similar work culture, which means you already have a common ground, and it’s much easier to start conversations.

Fitness Class/Gym

Another excellent place where it’s much easier and convenient to make new friends is one where you frequent like the gym or the fitness class you attend regularly. If you often see yourself working out in a group, that right there is a potential social circle. There is nothing that makes a great bonding than with people who experience the same hellish workouts as you do. If you go to some yoga classes or barre or spin classes, you can easily strike a conversation with people you are in class with. After all, you have a common ground to start conversations with. Plus, it always helps to have people to celebrate with after making it through a hard workout session. You can grab some lunch after or a drink.

Virtual Spaces

With the technology available wherever you look right now, it makes it easier to meet new people you can possibly be friends with. There are a lot of social media platforms where you can meet new people or find people who you have a common interest with. If you are strategic to use social networks, it can be a great place for you to meet and make new friends. You can join groups on social networking platforms with people who have the same profession as you do or passionate about the things you are also passionate about. It’s easy to get to know people you have something in common with, whether that’s the industry you work in or your hobbies or movies you like. Plus, meeting friends in social networking sites is also very convenient as you can do this anytime you are free, there is no having to schedule a meet-up or something early on your friendship.

Volunteer Opportunities

If you do volunteer works in your community, then that outlet can also be a great place to meet and start making new friends. Aside from it feels good that you can help and give back to a community you care deeply about, it’s a place where you can also meet people you have the same interests as you or the same values that you have. Plus, volunteering can make you feel good emotionally, and if you are in a comfortable and uplifting place, it is much easier to approach new people, start talking to them and eventually build a lasting friendship.

Events and Gatherings

Another place that would be a perfect meet-up with potential friends is live events, gatherings, or parties. These environments are usually made for socializing and meeting new people, which already eases out the awkwardness of meeting or talking to strangers. Plus, you will usually meet people with the same interest as you do during these types of events. For example, if you like football, going to football matches will likely have you seated with people who like the sport as much as you. If you go to concerts, then you are likely to meet with people who like the same artist, band, or music that you do. Having a central theme like in these events, you can easily connect or strike a conversation with other people. You can meet new people everywhere you go. But, if you want to avoid awkward conversations with strangers, these places that you frequent are the best and safest places where you can meet and make new friends.

Talking Tips in Striking New Friendship

So, you know the best places to meet new people you can possibly be friends with. Next comes the small talk. You have to know where to start and how to strike a conversation. Talking to people, not necessarily telling them all your life stories, is the start of potential friendships, which is why you need to practice how to start conversations with virtual strangers. Here are some tips when talking to people for the first time.

Don’t Force It

When it becomes too forced, it usually becomes fake, and you don’t want to start a friendship with pretenses. There is no need to force it or force conversations with people. If you are not the kind of person who just walks to complete strangers and start talking to them, then you don’t have to feel like you need to do that to make new friends. The less random the person or the conversation is, the less awkward it will be for the both of you. It is why meeting people in your work network or places you frequent are much better places to talk to people and meet new friends. But, if you randomly meet people in the street whom you recognize as someone from the different team in your office or from your yoga class, then some small talk would be nice. Instead of talking about random things, start with conversations that both of you can relate to. Like, if you start a conversation with a workmate, the recent meeting can be a great conversation starter instead of your cat at home.

Turn Acquaintances into Friends

There are a lot of people that you “sort of” know. For example, you have neighbors you always say hello or good morning to when you meet them in the street, but has never had any more conversation with them. Perhaps, there is someone who is enrolled in the same yoga class that you are enrolled in, but you have never talked to them. When you have something in common, then it is much easier to start a conversation with them. If you meet your neighbor one morning, instead of just saying hello, you can lengthen the conversation.

Ask Questions

One of the easiest ways to strike a conversation with people is to ask them questions. It’s also the easiest way to break the ice and overcome awkwardness in meeting virtual strangers. If you want to start talking with people in your office, you can ask them about the office Christmas party. Or, if you would like to start a conversation with someone in your workout class, you can start by asking them how they think of that tough workout session.

Offer Help

It’s not easy to start a conversation with people you are not very familiar with, more especially if you have known them for quite some time, but it’s your first time talking to them. One of the best tips on how to make new friends in your 30s and start a conversation is to offer help. Be prosocial and offer to partner up with other people. Or, if you see someone who needs some help to complete a task and you are capable of helping, offering your assistance or help is always a nice start for a new friendship. Helping other people or sharing them is a nice strategy that can ultimately lead to more conversations with them in the future.

When in Doubt, Remember F.O.R.M.

It’s never easy to take the first step in making conversation with people you are not very familiar about. There might be awkwardness, among other things. But when in doubt during conversations with other people, just remember the basic conversation starters which are family or from, occupation, recreation, and motivation, or in short, F.O.R.M. You can always start with some light and small conversations like asking where they are from, what they do or their work, and what they like and enjoy doing their free time.   It’s not easy to step up your socializing essentials, but knowing how to strike a conversation with people at work or neighbors can be an excellent start for more conversations that can possibly lead to friendships.

10 More Friendship Tips

Fool Proof Way on How to Make Friends in Your 20s and 30s 5Not everyone is a social butterfly. If you are looking for ways on how to make friends in your 20s, here are some more wonderful tips on how to make new friends that could help you.

Build Your Self Confidence

First and foremost, it takes courage to go to people who are virtual strangers to you and start a conversation with them. It is why having some sort of self-confidence will help. Get comfortable with yourself first, and more people will start getting comfortable around you, as well.

Join Something You are Passionate About

If you want to know one of the best tips on how to make friends in your 20s, that is to get yourself out there. One of the first steps on finding new friends is going to places that are social where you can meet people. It doesn’t mean that you have to go to places or join activities that you don’t want to be a part of. Instead, you can start joining groups with people who like the same things you like. Or, if you love learning new languages, you can join a class and meet people with the same interests as you.

Start Small with People You Already Know

Instead of talking directly to strangers, why don’t you start talking with people you have done small talk with before? It is less awkward, especially if you had talked to them before, no matter how short the conversation was.

Don’t Be Scared to Take the First Step

If you want to know how to make friends in your 30s, then you shouldn’t be scared of taking the first step. Nothing will happen if you just keep on waiting for other people to start talking to you. Take the first move, take the first step to say hello, and don’t be afraid to initiate the talk, because other people might just be waiting just like you were.

Be Open with Meeting Other People

Although not everyone you meet will become friends, one of the best tips when you are meeting new people is to be open about potential friendships. Open both your mind and heart. Avoid judging people instantly and give the friendship a chance to grow and blossom. Set aside present notions you have of other people and start knowing the real person, and you continue talking to them instead of putting those rumors you’ve heard about them in your head.

Get to Know Other People

Friendship is all about knowing each other. It’s not enough that the other person has known your life story. It is important that you get to know them too. You can ask a lot of different questions that can help you get to know them better like what they do for a living, their hobbies, what they’ve done recently that they enjoyed doing, the things they value the most in life, their goals, dreams, and their passion in life.

Stay True to Who You Are

If you want to start friendships that have a possibility of lasting for a long time, it is necessary that you start making friends on the right foot, and that means keeping true to yourself. Being real to who you are is one of the key ingredients to finding friends who are real to you and the relationship as well. Do not fake interests just to make friends. You don’t have to fake it just to fit in. Stay true to yourself, and eventually, you will find a tribe of your own.

Connect Genuinely with Other People

Aside from staying true to who you are, connecting to other people genuinely is also a great start in starting a friendship with other people. Show warmth, respect, care, and love and do all these things because you genuinely want to do them and not just because you are forced to do them. If you approach other people genuinely, they are more likely to connect genuinely with you, as well.

Don’t Expect Too Much

Starting a friendship with other people takes time and effort. But no matter how much time or effort you put, you can’t be friends with everybody. So, avoid expecting too much from other people. Be more realistic in your goals and expectations.

Make an Effort to Stay in Touch

Lastly, starting conversations might be a bit tricky, but continuing to stay in touch takes much more effort. If you want to stay and continue being friends with people, continual effort is necessary. Your willingness to stay in touch determines whether they are simply your acquaintance or much of a regular friend with the potential of becoming a best friend.   It’s not easy to make new friends. If you think you are a bit rusty when it comes to meeting new people and striking conversations with virtual strangers, these tips on how to make friends should help you, whether you are meeting prospective friends online, at work, at the gym, or in your neighborhood.   Match with people nearby and discover local events based on similar interests. Make friends and keep meetups near you safe by leaving references. Download our app from Google Play or Apple Store.